art is pain

i just finished watching The Doors which is a movie about the band The Doors and Jim Morrison. i really enjoy movies like that. ones that are about real, famous, legendary people. the movies are always artistically done, deep, and make me think about what i will do with my life. all of these art types, like the ever legendary Lizard King himself, were into crazy drugs and had messed up lives. it makes me think if i will ever amount to anything because i live a relatively average life. of course i'm not going to go out and trip on acid or anything like that. i definitely do not want to end up ODing in my bath tub at age 27. i mean i think the man was an amazing poet and had something weird going on in his brain but i hope my life is maybe ten times more glamorous, but i'd be ok with half the success. it is kind of like kurt cobain too. people say they don't believe he killed himself. i'm not sure what to think about that but i think he was probably on so many drugs that it seemed like a good idea at the time.
the large majority of the best or at least most famous artists and visionaries were weirdos. i like to think i am kind of weird. my brain moves a million miles a minute, literally 24/7. my dreams are more often than not wild and crazy. i notice another similar thing about all of these amazing people and that is that they have notebooks and journals documenting all the crazy weird thoughts they have. i want to do that. i want to document everything. i like to think i want to write it down so i will know it later, but maybe i will become legendary and then someone will publish my diary just like kurt cobain.
i can at least dare to dream. i also hope one day i can go to paris and visit Père Lachaise Cemetery where Jim Morrison and so many other amazing people are buried.

Music: The Doors, Janis Joplin, Nirvana