i've calculated that october 12th was the last day i felt truly elated. that saddest thing is that those wonderful feelings, feelings of hope, happiness, and love were all because of someone else. that someone else who doesn't even speak to me anymore. i had about one month of this fantasy feeling and i think it's really hitting me now that is is over. it is over. i can't fix it. i can however survive. i have to take this disappointment and turn it into something good, no matter how hard that is going to be. i have to learn from it, move on from it, and make things better the next time. i feel ridiculous, but i am 17 after all. this is just one step in the staircase of life, so to speak. but no matter what, i'll never forget october 12 and i hope that there are many more oct 12's to come in my life.
Music: Jack's Mannequin
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