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last night i attended McClatchy's graduation. i was so lucky that emily was able to give me a spare ticket. i honestly have to say that overall our CB ceremony is much, much nicer but this graduation had a significantly larger emotional affect on my for some reason. when i graduated i smiled all day because i felt like that is what i was supposed to do; be happy. girls around me were jumping up and down giddy, wiping each other's tears crying, and some even just wanting to get it over with. happy, sad, angry, i felt none of them. i felt...nothing. but last night that changed. not only did i see one of my closest friends graduate (which i am very proud of him), i also realized that i am grown up and over petty high school bullshit, i also saw my first friend from my entire life graduate, and i also cried. i can't exactly pin point what it was at this graduation that evoked emotion from me that my graduation was missing. i kind of think i finally felt emotional because it really is over. when i graduated i had something of high school to hold on to. some of my oldest friends were still in high school and that meant that the end wasn't yet here. now that they have all finished, as i have, it really is the end. we are all out of high school. we are all going to different places. we are all grown up. i suppose i can't handle it because now there is no control. there is nothing holding my friends here in sacramento where i will always know i can find them. they are just as free as i am to go where they want, when they want, and leave me and everyone else in the dust if they please. my hope is that they don't leave me in the dust.

Congratulations CKM graduates and all other's of the Class of 2009!

Music: pomp and circumstance