smile, you love us

i realize my only posts this month have appeared very "woe is me". i'm not unhappy. i am happy, in most respects anyway. things could be better but alas they could also be much, much worse.

this evening i am flying to Portland so my next post will be very long and full of amazing pictures and stories from my adventure!

Music: City Middle - the National

i'm missing a few people. people like the boys who weren't my lovers, but weren't my brothers. they were just my friends. right now i really want to spend time with them, to chill with them, to watch Wedding Crashers with them and laugh easily and without using my brain. i want to take naps on their couches and watch them try to dance at night in the park. i want to online shop with them and lose miserably at video games to them.
i'm missing a few things. things like the hot summer sun coaxing me out of my jeans and into cutoffs and then into my swimsuit and eventually the pool. things like sunglasses and diet coke that still tastes good even when the ice cubes completely melt and make it watery. things like staying out all night and going where ever i want, no concern of the late hour because i had the option of sleeping all day.
i miss sleeping all day and enjoying it rather than sleeping all day hoping that when i wake up enough time will have passed and it will be a day when i will get to enjoy all of these people and all of these things.

Picture on a Postcard

last night i went to the High School Self Portrait show to support one of my very close, and amazingly talented, friends, Eden. when faced with interacting with my old high school art teacher, a man who i thought felt i was talented and then throughout the rest of high school made it extremely hard to prove it to. i had to tell him how i hated art school and left. being surrounded by high schoolers made me realize that if need be, i am capable of being a mature adult. kind of a good realization although i never want to grow up.

today is the Super Bowl and the Colts are playing the Saints. you know who i'll be rooting for! but it is going to be a tough game.

Music: Hate Myself for Loving You - Joan Jett and the Blackhearts