A-PUSH

tomorow is my AP US HIstory final. we have to have our final 2 weeks early in order to be ready for our Ap test next friday. i'm extremely nervous and have been studying non stop for about 4 days. on saturday night Stephanie, Sarah Wong, Elsie, and I all slept over at stephanie's house for a Study Sleepover Extravaganza. we studied (among other things) from 1pm to 3am and then woke up at 8am and studied until around 12:30. it was a lot of fun, but so much work! we also played plenty of guitar hero, watched that thing you do, and made summer journals with magazine pictures. having my second sleepover with a group of CB girls was once again, very fulfilling. i felt like i belonged to something and really happy that i have a true group of friends, especially ones that go to my school. i'm excited for this school year to end, but also a little sad that we will only have one year left.


we coined the mantra "make karen proud" to keep us motivated.


we didn't want to disappoint her !!


i took this of sarah while she was making her journal. i like it.

oprah wins-me

haha. you like that subject title? yea, i'm clever at times. today oprah won me over with her perfect show. it had 2 of my favorite things on it: Little People, Big World and the Jonas Brothers !!! how fantastic is that? i was actually home on time to see it and everything.

gooo team

today i quit softball. it was something i needed to do for myself. i have my history final, SAT's, US history AP test and a whole slew of other academic problems on my plate. add onto that a photography project and just sleeping, eating, and showering. yea, i just don't have the time for it right now. i'll miss most of the girls, and i can only hope they will miss me. i know a few of them won't, but i don't care about them anyway.
speaking of photography, i'm doing a show with my school. we are teaming up with Sac High for a photography show at the 40 Acres gallery in Oak Park. the theme of the show is spirituality and faith in people's lives. i'm doing the life of the brothers. i'm pretty excited and glad for the opportunity for some exposure as well as the critiques from actual photo-journalists. i'll update on that one later.
stephen and i reunited on our history studying today. it felt good. when he depends on me to be ahead and on track, i am. i've gotten behind because he didn't need me anymore. i know i complain about people being needy, but really i thrive on it.

honor and respect

on tuesday i went on a junior retreat. in case you don't know what that is, it is something we do at catholic schools where a group of students go somewhere for the day [or days] and take part in activities which help you relax and learn things about yourself and others. it is usually meant to be a religious experience, but if you are like me then it doesn't have to be. they are a lot of fun and help you think about things and find clarity. anyways, one of the senior leaders was a boy named mark sauser. he is going to West Point Military Academy for college next year and he is going to join the Army. seeing as my brother wants to join the marines, i find this to be very noble. most of the day i observed Mark and saw what a real man he was. he wears his Army boots to school to break them in. he carries himself upright and presents himself well. he even spoke like a man in front of the group. as i watched mark i thought about the Vietnam war videos we've watched in Lit class and how those soldiers were all just boys, like mark. i pictured him both in combat, which made me sad, and standing at attention in line with other soldiers, which made me proud. i thought about all the other boys i know in high school. they all look just like any of those boys in the video, and any of them could one day be a soldier. it makes me sad to think that even if i don't know them barely at all, if they died i'd be sad. but mostly it makes me proud to know that there are other people like my brother who are passionate about joining the military. a lot of people laugh when they hear that tim wants to be a marine, but i dont really like when they do. it is the place where he finds his purpose and it is an honorable life-path. serving your country is and should be one of the most honorable things any person could do, and it takes great courage and dedication. it is a hard reality to face, the fact that my brother could go to war, but i'd be more proud of him than sad if he died because i know that he died doing something that so many other people only dream they were brave enough to do. people like mark bring me great inspiration. they are stronger than most everyone else.

a lot to get to

this will be a long one. i'm going to update on everything that has gone on. well, at least everything i can think of that is significant.

PROM: last friday night [4/4] was our prom at CB. it was held at the Arden Hills Country Club in fair oaks which is this outrageously lavish country club for rich people. i thought it was over the top and unnecessary, but o well. so parker was my date, which now that i look back on it might have been a mistake. we didn't have a bad time, but i didn't have the best time possible either. anyway, it began with christy, sarah wong, and i going to get our nails done. that was fun. i've never gotten my nails done at a salon before. then i went to katie jelicich's house to get ready. the only picture i have from the entire night is from there. after i went home parker picked me up, late, and we got lost on the way. we got so lost that we ended up getting a call from the school wondering if we were coming or not. whatever. we eventually get there and he is very pissed off, and i am very stressed out and trying to be accommodating. so he ate, we went to take pictures, and then checked our stuff. the picture line was a million years long, but it was fun because i got to talk to tatiana and her date who she doesn't know, and parker started to be in a better mood. after pictures we danced, until we decided to talk to natalie. then parker decided to dance with natalie. i decided to not get mad and go find my other friends instead. i did, and parker eventually came looking for me. after a little yelling and discussion we went to dance for the short remainder of the event and left 1/2 and hour early to beat the crowds. parker dropped me off and i drove to claire's house to hangout with all the rest of the people going over there. all the girls slept over and had a really fun time. overall, i enjoyed my prom experience. not to mention, i looked hott thanks to michael lopez's dress.

SAN JOSE: this friday night i went to San Jose with Lizzy, Gina, and Felicia for Self Against City. the whole street team came [minus hilary who had the ACT the next morning] and we rocked some new home made shirts. we are officially Team Gold now and each of our shirts had one of the guys names on it and a number corresponding to them. they are like sports jersey type things. i had a great time minus the stupid hardcore kids and the lack of people there to see SAC. as usual it was great to hangout with the girls and a light in my life to see the guys. i got home late and had to go to a softball tournament the next morning.


this weekend: yesterday was the folsom softball tournament. it was fun despite the heat and my only having four hours of sleep. the team played well, losing the first game 3-2 and winning the other two games. my job of applying everyone's sunscreen was a little gross, but i still had a nice time being with all the girls. today my dad took my brother and i shopping at the folsom outlets. i got a new puma windbreaker, two puma headbands, a new pair of black converse all-stars [because my old ones are fucked], and a pair of tan jack purcells [20$ !!]. now i must do my essay so that i can have a picnic with my friends tomorow. the weather has been hott, but i like the shining sun. i want to go swimming soon.

fancy footwork

so this is a pre-prom update. for the record, i'm going with parker stewart. it should be fun. michael lopez is making my dress. it is almost finished, and it looks so FIERCE and FABULOUS. i'm extremely excited. it has a luella-esqueness to it, which is what i wanted really. sarah, christy and i are getting our nails done on friday, and everything is planned. it is going to be great.

on a not so great note, mr. mcgovern informed me that they might cut the AP art class because not enough students have signed up. apparently we have 8 but they want 12. last year, they had 17 but they wanted only 12 so they cut some students. they say it is for budget reasons, which is the lamest excuse Cb can give anyone. i'm going to appeal to mr schuman and then mr. burnell, and then talk to the friends of the arts. i'll probably also have my parents call the school and the other AP art kids' parents call the school. i'm lighting the fire under the admin's ass because this is ridiculous.

much more on prom and Ap art later. i'll post pictures and whatnot.
btw, if you read my blog, feel free to comment. i love comments.